Environmentalists are idiots. They actually believe that humans are a legitimate threat to the planet. Are you shitting me? We are, at best, a slight rash. When the planet starts coughing up blood, then I'll listen to environmentalists

Tulsa Spelled backwards = a sluT.

Think about it.

According to most religions there is a Heaven and Hell. What isn't generally known is that, due to overcrowding, no more people are being admitted into either. Every person who's died since 1982 is currently inhabiting a small public toilet somewhere in southern Honduras. I will get back to you when I find out exactly which one.

The fastest way to get rid of a hard on is to cut off your dick. Keep in mind this only works once.

The next time someone ask you "How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?", ask them, "How much wood would a woodchuck fuck if a woodchuck could fuck wood?" Get back to me with their responses.

I actually know the answer to the question, "Which came first, the chiken or the egg?"

The appropriate answer is, "Who gives a fuck, hippie? Pass the KFC."

Fun-fact: Christian's hate me.
P.S. They hate you too.

A conversation between two rabbits:
"Holy shit! Jesus is back from the dead!"
"Oh no, look out! Here he comes!"
"Ungh, oh Christ! I just crapped an egg!"
The origin of Easter.

Fun-fact: Most people don't like getting shot.

Uh-oh, Jesus looks angry!